Let’s Do It, Ride It, My Pony!

As a child I thought sex was kissing under the bed sheets, because that’s what I saw in movies. Sex was never discussed in my household; I just knew not to come home pregnant, that was “my talk.” I specifically remember in the 6^th grade, a boy said to me “Why don’t you go home and play with your dildo!” Having zero information to what sex was, naturally I resorted to the internet, private browsing mode of course, because it was the family computer. I searched dildo and discovered it was a sex toy. I knew porn was sex, so I decided to look up porn and that’s when I found out.  

Seventh grade approached, and we signed a waiver to participate in a sex ed class during P.E., and yes, it was taught by our gym teacher. We did not learn about the actual act of sex or that there are many ways to have sex. We were simply shown a slideshow of STDs and that condoms prevent them. Sex is barely being taught in schools along with LGBTQ+ sex and gender identification, which both should be taught by a sexual expert. Throughout the years, my main source of sexual education was social media. Although it is not the best place to seek this information, it would always find itself on my timeline. Social media has taught me about dental dams, the pros and cons of birth control, pronouns, and etc. Recently, a friend discovered a podcast “Call Her Daddy” where two young women discuss sex and their own personal tips.

Women recently have taken a bigger stand against slut shaming and rape culture through an organized protest, the SlutWalk. Although it is transnational, Amber Rose is the face in the United States. Young women are dressed in revealing clothing, with signs about sexual liberation or consent. As a young black woman, I’ve been told from a very young age that I cannot wear certain types of clothing because it will attract the wrong type of attention from men and I will be scrutinized by older women throughout the community because “You asked for it.” Women do not ask to be catcalled. Women do not ask to be harassed. Most importantly, women do not ask to be groped or raped. I’m only 19, but the internet has taught me more about sexual health and liberation than any sex ed class taught in school.